Whew. Found some deeper truths for myself within your analysis here. I saw this cup craze was connected to Starbucks and stopped paying attention but the broader convo is so important - thanks for having it 🙌🏼
I appreciate how you're able to call out the madness of consumerism while also recognizing it in yourself. It's a good reminder to all of us that we can both call out problems in others while being complicit in such acts ourselves and that the entire system affects all of us.
Excellent essay; thank you for prodding necessary reflection. I am often on the road for work and carry an old green stanley thermos most of the time. I have always loved the "Dad going to work when the morning is still dark" vibe it held for me. I picked up a clearance stanley mug at target in 2016 (ha!) and enjoyed using it in obscurity until now. Thank God it isn't pink. I've been outside the edge of cool most of my life and struggle to understand why anyone wants what everyone else wants - when it comes to stuff, of course, not love.
This was quite the soul punch to wake up to today... one I did not know I needed. Thank you Frederick for constantly, lovingly, and patiently walking us towards the truth that will lead us all home.
So true. It’s all in those pathways. The neural pathways created during our formative years, influence by capitalism’s unending need for consumption at the expense of everything. Those pathways that give us a dopamine response to further solidify their connection. Those pathways that even when we’ve struggled against them, keep promising that sweet sweet dopamine in a world filled with strife. Despite us knowing that the relief will be momentary, we still seek it because of the pathways telling us there is a reward. Overriding cognitive processes that can rationalize how we know it will be brief, we know unfettered consumption is killing our planet, and then adding the complexity of being part of a social in group that only further solidifies the need, to be seen. Seen as one of those who belongs even just for a moment, in our hyper individualized society where community has been lost for so many for so long.
What a poignant reflection. I believe that you are 100% correct, that belonging matters so much that many - including myself - will go to great lengths to feel included. And the worst part is, at least for me, that most of these choices are unconscious. It was similar, though less widespread, with Uppa Baby strollers when I was a new mother in 2014. I wanted one so badly, so I could be seen as a "good mother." Only now do I see how insane that was. To me, the lesson is to be more inclusive myself, so that all may feel welcome, regardless of what possessions they do or don't have.
I’m a child of the 80s and even then we had “must have” consumer goods-Gloria Vanderbilt jeans and Members Only jackets are two that come to mind. Of course, I don’t remember anyone camping out at the local Dillard’s to make sure they got GV jeans with an embroidered heart (these did not exist, but probably would have had some exec thought about it). As to those who gave up the boycott so they wouldn’t be left out on the pink heart Stanley—speaks to how performative many boycotts are. One other thing, which is me nitpicking, the image strikes me as off. The Stanley cup craze isn’t being driven by suburban dads, but by suburban moms and their preteen daughters.
This is GREAT writing. I can see from fellow commentors that I am not alone in the reflections this forced me to reckon with as I read along. Thank you for this today. It is a message we all need reminding of, and I am grateful you provided us with it.
Can't help but relate this bit with the medieval - "This phenomenon is not simply about consumer goods; it's a reflection of a deeper, more troubling trend. We are witnessing a further commodification of identity, where self-worth and social standing are increasingly measured by the things we possess. Social media amplifies this, turning every user into a potential advertiser, every post into a subtle nudge towards consumption. In this digital arena, the lines between genuine interest and induced desire dim, leaving us chasing after shadows of fulfillment." - European nobility would spend endless amounts on their appearance to ensure all those in view would know their "value." Kingdoms would be crumbling under plague, in-fighting, and lawlessness, yet money was spent on higher quality materials for the select few. All projection. All so inhumane.
Whew. Found some deeper truths for myself within your analysis here. I saw this cup craze was connected to Starbucks and stopped paying attention but the broader convo is so important - thanks for having it 🙌🏼
I appreciate how you're able to call out the madness of consumerism while also recognizing it in yourself. It's a good reminder to all of us that we can both call out problems in others while being complicit in such acts ourselves and that the entire system affects all of us.
Excellent essay; thank you for prodding necessary reflection. I am often on the road for work and carry an old green stanley thermos most of the time. I have always loved the "Dad going to work when the morning is still dark" vibe it held for me. I picked up a clearance stanley mug at target in 2016 (ha!) and enjoyed using it in obscurity until now. Thank God it isn't pink. I've been outside the edge of cool most of my life and struggle to understand why anyone wants what everyone else wants - when it comes to stuff, of course, not love.
This was quite the soul punch to wake up to today... one I did not know I needed. Thank you Frederick for constantly, lovingly, and patiently walking us towards the truth that will lead us all home.
So true. It’s all in those pathways. The neural pathways created during our formative years, influence by capitalism’s unending need for consumption at the expense of everything. Those pathways that give us a dopamine response to further solidify their connection. Those pathways that even when we’ve struggled against them, keep promising that sweet sweet dopamine in a world filled with strife. Despite us knowing that the relief will be momentary, we still seek it because of the pathways telling us there is a reward. Overriding cognitive processes that can rationalize how we know it will be brief, we know unfettered consumption is killing our planet, and then adding the complexity of being part of a social in group that only further solidifies the need, to be seen. Seen as one of those who belongs even just for a moment, in our hyper individualized society where community has been lost for so many for so long.
What a poignant reflection. I believe that you are 100% correct, that belonging matters so much that many - including myself - will go to great lengths to feel included. And the worst part is, at least for me, that most of these choices are unconscious. It was similar, though less widespread, with Uppa Baby strollers when I was a new mother in 2014. I wanted one so badly, so I could be seen as a "good mother." Only now do I see how insane that was. To me, the lesson is to be more inclusive myself, so that all may feel welcome, regardless of what possessions they do or don't have.
Your writing is so crazy-good, that it makes me wish I had written this while at the same time thankful that you did, because it’s better.
Thank you for this Fred. Sharing w some of the teens in my life ❤️
"We are losing ourselves in a maze of materialism, where the pursuit of the inconsequential leads us away from the path of true fulfillment."
What a sentence! Great essay
I’m a child of the 80s and even then we had “must have” consumer goods-Gloria Vanderbilt jeans and Members Only jackets are two that come to mind. Of course, I don’t remember anyone camping out at the local Dillard’s to make sure they got GV jeans with an embroidered heart (these did not exist, but probably would have had some exec thought about it). As to those who gave up the boycott so they wouldn’t be left out on the pink heart Stanley—speaks to how performative many boycotts are. One other thing, which is me nitpicking, the image strikes me as off. The Stanley cup craze isn’t being driven by suburban dads, but by suburban moms and their preteen daughters.
This is GREAT writing. I can see from fellow commentors that I am not alone in the reflections this forced me to reckon with as I read along. Thank you for this today. It is a message we all need reminding of, and I am grateful you provided us with it.
Can't help but relate this bit with the medieval - "This phenomenon is not simply about consumer goods; it's a reflection of a deeper, more troubling trend. We are witnessing a further commodification of identity, where self-worth and social standing are increasingly measured by the things we possess. Social media amplifies this, turning every user into a potential advertiser, every post into a subtle nudge towards consumption. In this digital arena, the lines between genuine interest and induced desire dim, leaving us chasing after shadows of fulfillment." - European nobility would spend endless amounts on their appearance to ensure all those in view would know their "value." Kingdoms would be crumbling under plague, in-fighting, and lawlessness, yet money was spent on higher quality materials for the select few. All projection. All so inhumane.